Every January 1, I start the year with so much hope.
Every December 31, I cannot wait for the new year to start.
2014 was a difficult 12 months for me. But it was never going to be anything else. The year was dominated by the fact that my baby girl was turning 18, graduating high school and starting college. I would not have had it any other way, but that doesn’t mean that letting go wasn’t hard.
This was also the year when I had to face the fact that my good health wasn’t a given. I have been very fortunate that I’ve made it to my age without any huge health issues, but I think that made the hysterectomy I endured in September all the more frightening. I don’t like doctors, I don’t like hospitals, I don’t like feeling dependent on others. I mean, who does? I spent a lot of time this year in denial that the surgery was going to happen, and then when I finally accepted it, I used up a lot of energy dreading what was to come.
On the bright side, with the timing right after Megan left for college, my surgery distracted me from realizing how much I missed her.
I was surprised at how quickly I was able to get back on my feet after the surgery. I’ve also been surprised by the lingering after-effects. It took eight weeks for the incision to heal… but I’m still feeling pain in my belly and am not sure when I’ll be back to 100%. This is annoying, except when I can use it to get out of unpleasant tasks like cleaning the cat box. I predict that I will be back to performing that chore early in 2015 – just not this week.
As last year ended, I acquired a client that has kept me working for them almost exclusively. This has also been a boon to my adjustment to my new post-mom life. But the time I’ve devoted to work has left little for blogging, and I miss having this outlet for self-expression. I hope to rectify that over the next few days, as I revisit the original purpose of this blog and post several observations from our recent visit to the UK (just concluded on Monday). It kind of harks back to the cyclical nature of the New Year: My very first posts — 11 years ago — were about such a visit. I never expected my blog to last beyond that vacation.
I’ll see you next year.